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Starting a family or adding to your family is a very special gift. If you’re trying to get pregnant, it’s important to know it may not happen right away. For some, it can take up to a year to get pregnant. Before you start trying to conceive, even if you’re not worried about getting pregnant, it’s best to talk to your doctor. You may want to consider having both you and your partner evaluated for any issues that might prevent pregnancy or for ways to increase your chances of getting pregnant.  

Why can't I get pregnant? 

There are a lot of factors that can affect becoming pregnant, and these factors can come from both partners. Here are some factors that can affect your ability to conceive: 

  • Stress. If you are experiencing high levels of stress or are put into constant situations of stress, it may affect your chances of becoming pregnant. High levels of stress can affect a woman’s hormones and their ovulation cycle.  
    • Tip: Exercise or mediation are great ways to fight back and reduce stress.  
  • Sleep deprivation. This goes for both men and women. Getting enough sleep and maintaining a proper sleep schedule is best for everyone. Proper sleep reduces stress, improves the immune system and gives you more energy.  
  • Healthy weight. Being overweight or underweight can affect your chances of getting pregnant. Weight issues can make your ovulation cycles irregular or not happen at all. If you’re concerned about your weight, it’s recommended to talk with your doctor about how to properly gain or lose weight. 
  • Understanding your menstrual cycle, (your period). Many women do not truly understand how their cycle works and when the best times are to conceive. Knowing when ovulation occurs and understanding the life span of sperm and eggs (ovum) will give you a more accurate idea of when it is the right time to try getting pregnant. 
  • Stay positive. Remind yourself that pregnancy can take time and that every person is different. What works for someone else may not work for you. Being prepared before you are ready to conceive will give you an advantage. 

Am I “too old” to get pregnant? 

There is a lot of speculation around when women are no longer able to have children. The most important thing to remember is that every woman is different and what may work for one person may not work for another. In general, the older you are, your chances of getting pregnant decrease because the number of eggs you have decreases. Women 27-34 have a 40% chance of getting pregnant whereas women ages 35-39 have a 30% chance. Fertility decreases about 95% for women 40 and older. 

You may have heard of advanced maternal age when referring to women 35 and older. This isn’t to scare women, it’s discussed because there can be some risks to consider when you become pregnant at age 35 and older: 

  • It can be harder on the woman’s body if it’s her first pregnancy. 
  • Egg quality decreases with age. 
  • Higher risk of miscarriages, ectopic pregnancy, gestational diabetes and/or genetic disorders. 
If your age worries you when you decide to become pregnant, talk your doctor before trying. Remember, staying healthy can help you, your body/pregnancy and your baby. 

I'm ready to conceive, now what? 

If you and your partner have decided it’s time to try for a baby, this can be very exciting and maybe even a little overwhelming. Here are some tips that may help increase your chances of getting pregnant.  

  • Time your attempts with your body’s natural fertility cycle.
    • To start, track your fertility cycle. This will tell you when you have an increased chance of getting pregnant. There are several ways to determine where you are in your cycle and when you are ovulating. Most women have a 28-day menstrual cycle; however, the menstrual cycle is unique to everyone. There are many great apps to track your cycle.  
    • Note: The first day of your cycle is the first day of your menstrual period and the last day is the day before your next period begins. 
  • Next, determine your fertile window.
    • This is the time during your menstrual cycle when it is possible to get pregnant. Technically, pregnancy is only possible between the five days before ovulation and the day of ovulation. These six days are known as the fertile window and reflect the lifespan of sperm and ovum. The life span of sperm within the fertile cervical fluid is at most five days, but most commonly for one to two days. An egg will live for about 12-24 hours after ovulation.  
  • When to have intercourse.  
    • The best time to get pregnant is the two to three days before ovulation: typically, days 12 and 13 of your cycle. Even though your most fertile days are the three days before you ovulate, you’re also able to become pregnant up to five days before, because sperm can live up to five days in the female reproductive tract. Utilizing an ovulation/fertility tracker app will help you pin-point the exact days you should try to conceive. To maximize your chance of conception, have intercourse daily until ovulation is confirmed. 
    • How often you want to try to conceive can fall under two methods, the “spread the wealth” method and the “ready, aim, fire” method. The “spread your wealth” method is where you will have sex frequently every week, aiming for at least three to four times a week. The “ready, aim, fire” method is focused more on those that track their fertility closely. For this method you would have sex every day that you have fertile cervical mucus, a positive ovulation detecting test or a positive saliva ferning test.  
Keep in mind your ovulation cycle can be affected by stress, illness and changes in routine. Don’t let trying to get pregnant push you to a point where you can’t conceive. Reach out to others, including support groups, and speak with your doctor on how to effectively get pregnant for your way of life. If you have more questions about fertility and your chances of getting pregnant, talk to your doctor.